My hand searched for my phone. Under the pillow – no. In the small space of  my 7*3 bed, unoccupied by discounted tiny mattress – no. In the folded bed sheet, on which I had slept but then it wrapped me like a martyr in national flag – no.

I didn’t want the trouble of opening my eyes. I started measuring my mattress’s dimension by spreading my leg to search for my phone. My flesh of leg touched something cold. That must be the metal back of my phone. Yes!!! Indeed.

I grabbed my phone. Without opening my eyes, I typed my password. Same password for almost a year then, and an whooping hundred texts per day, gave me enough practise for typing messages under the table in classroom without deterring my look from the teacher.

“1 message received.”

The sign of closed envelope on the home screen forced my sleepy eyes peeping through corners avoiding sharp back light to open with full capacity. It has now become ritual to enter in the world of dreams while spilling my heart in 160 characters. Every good and every bad were routed there. These textx were my bed time stories. Some from me, some from her; they were me without being censored. Life was good.

There was ocean of comfort and me; I started believing.

People are too busy to care for your too serious problem. I turn blind eye to them. You expect nothing and your life expectancy increases by four years. Four years are the weight of your expectations and the following disappointments.

This girl made me expect and decreased my life expectancy.

Socho ki Jheelon ka sehar ho!!”

I read the line. I read it again. My mind raced to recognise the movie but failed. Other day, I was playing BOLLYWOOD, and I wasn’t able to guess even popular movies. My sleepy hand involuntarily typed a smiley.


Something happened one day. Ocean of water that was infinite seemed to shrink. I stayed on shore. I looked at sea. There was water; usual blue coloured as if inviting blue cloudless sky for date over a cup of coffee. I started running. My throat dried. I couldn’t even make a sound. I was running. I want to touch the water.

I was running.

I stepped up my speed but water still looked far, unperturbed by my running. Moments later, I realised Mirage. Yes!! It was mirage and I was running behind water with no physical reality.

I was unsatisfied but ok! I never expected again.

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