Saturday, October 9, 2010

I Hate Growing

2-3 weeks back, my friend said,"I hate growing." My friend gave me many examples to support this statement. Though i was not satisfied with the justifications given by him, but certainly i agreed upon the fact that I too hate growing. Though i am a student and i don't do anything else other than studies to worry about but yet every night when i go to sleep, my mind is full of thoughts. On an average i have 4-5 hours of class everyday, and if i attend every class with full concentration, then at the end of day, i have no strength to do anything. Leave doing something creative. Interactions with friends are also decreasing day by day. I talk more on gtalk than face to face. And i think, many of my friends will accept this. Earlier, people used to sit together and share their life, feelings and by this they make others divide their pain and multiply joy. As i am growing, my responsibilities are increasing and this is what i am hating. Everyday i am becoming more bounded, thought wise, feeling wise and this is what i am hating. I have to take care of my marks otherwise i will not get a handsome price for my degree, i will not get a good college for MS. Those who lag in this race for marks in the highly competitive tournament are frustrated and this is shown at many places. Most common example is the gtalk status, their status are generally inspirational quotes. Let me give you some examples,"It doesn't matter you win or lose, what really matters is how you finish it." Another one"Dreams are not that you watch with closed eyes but dreams are those that doesn't let you sleep." Sometimes, i feel i am lost in this huge world and finding a door to get out is impossible.


Now when i am growing, there is no one to scold at me, i am the master of my own and this is what i hate. I love the days of my childhood whenever i did something wrong, 1 slap was enough to make my mistake correct. Now, when i do mistake, i miss the slap. I pray for that slap so that pain of the slap kills the pain of mistake. I love the days of childhood, when i used to become happy at every small thing of life, now i have to search the instances of happiness. I love the days of childhood when after a big fight with friend, we used to share lunch but now we have a new friend "ego", who eats our happy moments with our friends and we fight for useless things and kill our good time.

I dont know what is good or bad and i dont want to have any opinion but I suppose many of my friend can relate themselves here and THINK.
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